Last night, I met this girl who, for a second time in six months, was a lawyer, from New York, and Caribbean. Both women captured me in a way as if to show me something for my future. They possessed characteristics that I’ve been finding to be most attractive in women. She (in the plural) was smart, subtle, but very alive in their personality. She flirted and joked in a mellow way, that wasn’t too aggressive, it was playful. They were both educated and cute. I think it’s the juxtaposition that being lawyers they carry a very feminine vulnerability, with the capacity to really fuck with you in court, that I find really attractive. A dynamic range that makes them three-dimensional and not the traditional weekend flirtation that is sex-driven and grounded in ‘the game’.
I kept trying to get her attention, asking questions, cracking jokes that were for her. She kept threatening to make me carry her over my shoulder if she got drunk. She kept looking cute to me. She kept wearing nice jeans. We eventually walked away from the rest of the group and had our own little conversation (always a good sign I think). The highlight of the evening was when we were sitting at a bar and having a group conversation… one of us made a charming joke and she happened to lean into me, touching shoulders. That dip toward me, with a slight head leaning in my direction, showed a level of comfort that only couples share when they are in the movie theater, on the couch, or group conversation at dinner parties. The lean is just to tell you “I’m thinking of you sweetie… here is a lean so that you know this”.
So what happened? Did I get her number? Did we say we’d call each other? No. For both instances, it was due to stupid reasons. The first time, it was because I was seeing somebody who wasn’t good for me and instead of looking at an opportunity, I decided to take it easy. The second time, she was leaving to go back to NY, and it seemed kind of silly to ask someone out when they live 5 hours away with 3 million people living in her town to meet and go out with. Like I said, silly reasons.
But, I did see my future. So, I’m happy to know what I’m going to get.
WHATS IN MY BOX: "The Love Below" by Andre 3000... Just finished a story by Miranda July... she is amazing!